Who is a LEADER

I am writing this note after listening to Suki Sivam's speech(spiritual and motivational speaker) on "Who is the Leader". I was so inspired by the story that I thought I should share it. Please read on:

There was a bus in which a lady(Lady A) was traveling along with other passengers. She wakes up very early, prepares breakfast, lunch for the entire family and along side got ready to go to office. By the time, she completed her regular morning household chores, she did not have time to even eat for herself!. She had to get ready to her office.

She came rushing to the bus-stop and got in to the regular bus. By then, she was very tired(and very hungry as well). She was shivering and felt very uncomfortable. She had packed rice for her lunch. She decided, she will eat what was packed for lunch. She opened the lunch box and was about to eat. That is when the driver applied a sudden brake and all the food spilled on the bus floor. It accidentally fell on a lady (Lady B) sitting beside her. Lady B got upset, annoyed and was furious. Lady A felt very guilty(she did not have food, tired and the food is water) of having spilled and caused inconvenience to fellow passengers. 

Everyone looked at her in a nasty way. No one seemed to understand the ordeal she underwent that day. She cried and apologized to each and everyone who she felt might have got disturbed. She cleaned the entire place and collected the spilled food in a bag to throw. She almost wiped the entire place. The lady sitting next to her, said"What big sorry are you saying after all these things? My saree is already spoiled.. Your sorry can't give me back my saree. Lady A felt bad and put her head down.

There was a six year old boy watching this entire episode. He slowly approached the Lady A. He opened his lunch box and said, "Aunty, my mother has packed 3 idlies for lunch. Would you like to eat? Will this be enough?. Adding,"Since you were very hungry, you opened the lunch box. Else, you would not have opened the box, right?". Listening to what this boy said, all the fellow passengers were moved and started crying and felt bad about themselves. the boy was the only person who understood the lady's feeling and what she was going through while the adults did not even bother to talk to her. The boy's action changed the entire passenger's attitude. This little boy emerged as the Real Leader... Born Leader.

A Leader is a person who understands other's feelings and changes the situation so as to make the other person and others happy!.

Signing off,

SPH

Controlling your Anger

Every one of us, sometime or the other get annoyed or angry. Some of us throw tantrums like children whilst some raise our voice and show our anger. If we notice, it is all momentary. It take so much of practice to control anger. I do not take an exception to my anger. I must admit, I am not a good candidate to Best Anger Management Practice. ;).

Having said that, I was browsing the Internet and found this short story which conveys so much of meaning. I will make conscious effort not to nail my fence.... ;).

Once upon a time, there was a little boy who was very talented and creative and very bright. Let's say a natural leader. The kind of a person everyone would normally want to have on their team or project. He was also self-centered and had a very bad temper. When he got angry, he usually said, and often did, some very hurtful things. In fact, he seemed to have little regard for people around him including friends. So, his friends list shrunk. He told to himself, "May be this just shows how stupid people are!"

As he grew, his parents were concerned about this personality flaw, and pondered long and hard about what they should do. Finally, the father had an idea. And he struck a deal with his son. He gave him a bag of nails, and a BIG hammer. "Whenever you lose your temper", he told the boy, "I want you to really let it out. Just take a nail and rive it into the oak boards of that old fence out back. Hit that nail as hard as you can!"

Of course, those weathered boards in that old fence were as tough as iron and the hammer was very heavy, so it was not nearly as easy as it initially sounded. Nevertheless, by the end of first day, the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence.

Gradually over a period of weeks, the number dwindled down. He started holding his temper. That proved to be easier than driving nails into the fence. Finally, the day came when the boy did not lose his temper at all and felt very proud. He told his parents about that accomplishment.

"As a sign of your success,"his father responded, "you get to PULL OUT one nail. In fact, you can do that each day that you don't lose your temper even once."

Many weeks passed. Finally one day, the young boy was able to report proudly that all the nails were gone. At that point, the father asked his son to walk out back with him and take one more good look at the fence. "You have done well, my son", he said. But, I want you to notice the holes that are left. 

No matter, what happens from now on, this fence will never be the same. Saying or doing hurtful things in anger produces the same kind of result. There will always be a scar. It won't matter how many times you say you're sorry, or how many years pass, the scar will still be there.And a verbal wound is as bad as a physical one. People are much more valuable than an old fence. They make us smile. They help us succeed. Some will even become friends who share our joys, and support us through bad times. And, if they trust us, they will also open their hearts to us. That means we need to treat everyone with love and respect. We need to prevent as many of those scars as we can.

Let us try to build bridges rather than barriers in Relationships!

Signing off,
SPH